Attempt at fencing the brainwaves...a predestined failure

Like a planet that spins too fast and is shunned out of the orbit for not staying in sync with the soporiphically sluggish surrounding environment, that's how my sanity must be feeling right now, thought the only fallacy in the statement is that my sanity can't feel, but that's how I feel so the feeling suffices.

As a kid, a thing you learn is that if you pedal too fast on a cycle with weakly assmbled wheels then soon the wheel will give way, leaving you down, injured and estranged. This is what has happened with me, I've been pedalling the cycle of my thoughts too fast and the wheel of reason and calm has just given in. It just went off. It's either gone temporarily or has abandoned me on the pretext that I don't use it much anyways.

Do not read the paragraphs as a whole, because they were not written with a single ink of reason but with an erratic lack of sensibility. I understand that's what your reasoning might ask you to do, but the case holds for may be other forms of writing. My musings are disjoint, like badly created prosthetics hinged to a human but they give you a clear picture in an aerial shot, in your broader conscious.

I'm feeling restless today, I just want to run like Forrest Gump. Try and run to the Himalayas till my legs, like few others in my life, reach a consensus that I'm a lost cause and withdraw support thinking there is no point clinging to a boat that is capsizing an inch a second, I don't know how fast it is, but I think it is fast.I wish to bark at the moon too, or pelt stones till it decides to turn it's ugly and sickly yellow face away, to show the sickly yellow back. I think it has done it's work of inspiring poets who have probably run out of any more metaphors comapring (and clandestinely criticizing) the lover's face to the epitome of blemishes itself.

Things are losing their taste, apart from beer, blood and defeat.All seems to be too trivial, to unexciting and too predictable.In this incessant drone of one paced life you lose the dreams faster than the time you take to conjure those up. All looks monotonously hazy and still. With you moving around in the same set built up for a movie that was shelved right after it's conception.

Thinking is a curse. Normal people start and stop thinking at the point of relevance and that's where I don't think. The daily rituals, the professional chores, the navigation to and from from man made destinations is like in a trance. Too easy, to untaxing. But that constitutes only one third of a solar day wid unpluggable gaps in between. The time warps, of flying or stuck times. The agonizing moments begin once you are alone. brain churns, like a vending machine gone horribly out of sync, thoughts at the speed which my dear reason could not take up in it's bag, perhaps that's why it felt dejected and left me, redoubting it's importance in my life. The candies are of all colors and flavors, like Berty Botts all flavor beans, but there seems to be no connection. Each thought is a whole in itself, each is complete but it completes some other idea too. So pieces fall in slowly in this jigsaw. Too slow for my comfort, too slow for my senses.

"You think a lot" they tell me. I know this for a fact, it's like telling a blind man "you know aditya, you can't see". I'm very much aware that I think a lot but what am I supposed to do about it. I think a lot on the topic "why do I think so much" but then this thought gets run over by some other thought so suddenly that I just forget that it existed few moments back.I think why do I not see fairys and neverlands and beautiful mermaids in my dreams. On that scale my dreams are not even worthy of being called dreams. I think in my dreams too, on the actions that someone else is committing. Why? I mean for once I can be the actor and someone else can carry the cross of thoughts.

But then I guess only those who can carry the burden get to wield the cross. I accept my fate. Accept a restless existance. Accept my sleepless nights. Accept to face the brunt. Accept to run.

Religion...a drug that failed

Before you go further, let me tell you that I believe in God and I'm not an atheist but I don't believe in religion. I'm sure all the believers and "Good God Fearing Men" will want to sue me for what I'm planning to discuss here. In short Religion has failed on humans. Humans proved to be an inferior race, like animals who could not digest good food and hence they go running around biting their own tails.

When I say humans just did not have the IQ to fathom the essence of religion, I'm told that HE is testing us. And when I ask He, WHO? the answer is the creator/God. I have a very simple question. According to the Creator theory, God created us and he knows all, what we did, what we are doing, what we will do or not do, hence now that everything is predecided, why does he have to test us regarding how we follow his preachings?

Somebody told me that God sent down religion. Now let's see. Let's go with this theory. If God did send religion to guide people, then why did he have to send so many religions that the mind of his children (humans) gets all messed up for he must have known the limitations of human mind and understanding, he should have stuck to one version of religion. But here is the catch, all the religions do infact tell the same thing. Love,peace,equality,compassion then what happened in the transition from heaven to earth that the interpretations changed. Shouldn't it have been uniform to make like minded people coexist. Hence the problem. The problem is not with God it lies with religion and the people who are the perpetrators of it. Religion without followers is like an engine without fuel. Religion needs believers, faithfuls and fanatics. So how can religions coexist if the best religious people are supposed to be those who follow the God's words blindly without questioning. And because of their vehemence and their sense of self righteousness they somehow believe that the "fellow brothers" of other religions need to adapt to this philosophy, not aware that that's what the fellow brethren thinks too. Hence the swords are drawn out and the lines clearly marked.

Religion was clearly developed to keep a decorum in the society. To eradicate the inquisitors by the root. God must have been there at some point in the history of life I do not deny that.But it was the people who wrote epics, who drafted the "ideal way of life". And this way of life though universal in general clearly shows the signs of time of the era when these books were being written. Hence what was considered perfectly acceptable in those times, vis. polygamy amongst kings, fight for power and lands was never preached against but the other values were set for the coming generations to follow and hence the path of the Gods, how they lived. The hero of those books became fixtures of our religious beliefs. Not very unlike what impressionable kids think of their favorite characters they see in movies or wrestling or cartoons. They see their heroes in not much different a way than their parents see Gods; the slayers of evil, protectors of faith, always truthful, violent ONLY when instigated by the "bad man". Where is the difference?

The people in those times understood the concept that entertainment is the best way to keep the crowd interested and to drill the points home theatrics is required.
So why religion? Because to put the preachings beyond doubt there needed to be description of a power you can not question, a. because it is too powerful and annoying him won't be a good idea and b. It is somwhere unseen where you can not go directly with a question or a suggestion. So when the society needed to learn that it is not advisable to have sexual liasions within the family, it was branded as a sin because the resulting offsprings were obviously unhealthy and as the scientific reasons had not been explored, the credit of "punishing" the wrong doers by defective births went to God almighty.

A myth, had there been no religion people would still have been barbarics.I'm sure people who say this say it without conviction,because this point makes me laugh, Barbarian the word itself is derogatory, the Greeks called , non-Greeks barbaric and the Christians called the non christians Pagans. Hence every one who belongs calls the other wrong. Going by the more common meaning of the word; Barbaric means savage hence if the religious wars, Jew-Muslims, Muslims-Christians, Hindus-Muslims are not barbaric, if the act of a 12 year old kid hacking the throat of a "Kafir" is not barbaric then I believe we are the most peaceful race in the galaxy.

But faith is strong and faith is good. It helps you seek for the virtual shoulder, it helps you become euphoric in the sad times by singing hymns, prayers or closing your eyes. It helps the people who are alone believe that they are not unprotected, there is someone watching over them and making sure that all the right will happen with him and if something wrong happens that was to test your character and make sure you are not becoming a tad too comfotable in your life.
And it's not God who told this., it's the humans who said so to console the weak, the troubled, the victims.
So the people who have relied too long on religion can not even dream about a world without those pillars on which their whole life has rested. Without religion they are exposed. It's about the condition of a common man who suddenly realizes in the middle of the street that he is naked. That is why religion needs to be revamped with times. Changed so that bpeople don't lose the perspective of life and behave like unreigned horses being (mis)guided by religion.
There needs to be an antidote for religion, a cure that makes the people understand that religion was just a way of teaching them the paths of life, it was just a medium and not the end in itself. Don't just read and believe. Read, test and understand, elminate what doesn't fir with times on ly then will you be truly religious. Clearly there has been an overdose of the religion pill which was supposed to be an answer to all the human fallacies, but the drug has reacted ; Religion has turned out to be a drug that failed.